Here in the southern hemisphere, winter’s fury has lost the battle in the slow march toward summer. We’re past the equinox, daylight savings has kicked in and although the rain still interrupts drying washing, mowing lawns and walking the dog, the days are gradually getting warmer, and we can count the sleeps until the summer holidays begin.
While we, here in New Zealand, are warming up and our days are getting longer, those of you living in the northern hemisphere are living the exact opposite. Your days are shortening and you’re heading for winter. For some of you that means snow, for others, cooler temperatures or rain.
Whichever direction you’re going, not everyone is going with you. Just as we are in spring and the northern hemisphere is cooling, so each of us are in a different place in our life journey and the season will change accordingly. Sometimes it is possible for us to change our season by positioning ourselves differently, other times we remain in the natural ebb and flow of life.
This week, I’m speaking to two different groups about the Camino, a 900km (560 mile) pilgrimage across the top of Spain that my husband and I completed two years ago. Near the beginning of the walk, I wrestled with the fact that I was walking in springtime when just days earlier I had left autumn, in New Zealand.
As I walked, I encountered new growth on the trees, fields full of flowers, occasional calves, birdsong, and other sights, sounds and smells associated with spring. I knew before I left that I was going to walk in spring, but the reality of it surprised me somehow. I had to shift seasons in my brain.
When you’re going through transition, you might be surprised by the sights and sounds that you encounter. You knew that this journey would look different to where you were, but now that you’re on the road, you’re experiencing the different season firsthand.
Allow yourself to enjoy the things you encounter on the journey. What do you notice? What can you be thankful for?
Some people prefer the cold, others like it hot. Some like the crisp mornings of autumn with settled weather, others prefer the wind and changeable nature of spring and the growth that comes with it.
I had packed for spring. Some mornings we started walking as the sun rose and it was clear and crispy. It was too cold to hold on to my walking sticks until about 8am. I wasn’t a fan of being cold, but I knew on those mornings that we were going to enjoy blue sky and sunshine all day. I was able to find something to be thankful for even though I was freezing cold for a while. We carried everything with us – I had no gloves with me and only a light down jacket. Sometimes I wished that I had brought gloves, but I knew that I wouldn’t need them for long. When I was tempted to buy some, there were no shops. I had to make do. I wore all my clothes first thing in the morning and peeled off unnecessary layers as it warmed up.
I assumed that we would get warmer and warmer, I didn’t pack for the reminders of winter in the midst of spring.
As we move through change, there are days that feel like the season before. We might wish for the comforts that we used in the last season. Sometimes when we’ve finally packed away our winter woolies, the weather turns cold for one last time. Where those resources are tucked away, sure, we can get them out and use them. But when resources are scarce, we just need to get through the discomfort, knowing that things are changing, that they won’t stay this way. Perhaps we use everything at our disposal just to get through. We can choose despondency on those days, or we can accept them as part of the process and keep looking ahead to what is coming.
If you’re making progress in an area but suddenly you are confronted with something that you thought was behind you, do not despair, it is a normal part of life. Acknowledge the throwback to the old season and look forward to what is ahead.
The fact that I had exited autumn and entered spring was pretty amazing. We think of skipping seasons as unrealistic, but it is possible. Where we desire change, we can prioritise and work toward it. Major change usually takes thinking outside the box, saving, planning and doing things in the right timing, but it is possible. Most people don’t do it, but that doesn’t mean that it can’t be done.
Where we’re stuck in a cycle, we can make a change. It takes some dreaming and allowing ourselves to think differently, then planning and putting things in place before we make a move. Although we generally move through the seasons of life, there are times that we can step out of where we’ve been and step into something different.
We can look for a role that fulfills us and step into that. We can choose to forgive and restore relationship. We can get involved in the community. We can choose to eat or move differently. We can look for someone to help and support.
These things may give us a boost or a lift, but remember, as we walk into this new thing, there will be days that feel like the old. There will be days that we feel blah. There will be days that old relationship patterns rear their head. There will be days that we’d rather stay at home. There will be days that we eat something out of convenience. There will be days where we don’t know what we have to offer.
Don’t allow the discomfort of those moments put you off track. You have already stepped into the new. Things are growing and changing even when you hear echoes of the old.
Your journey does not look like the next person’s. Just because you are in a certain season does not mean that your neighbour is experiencing the same thing. Others may not understand where you’re at, whether it’s enduring a season or making a change. That’s okay, you will find others on the road with you. Remember, most people don’t make that change. But that doesn’t have to stop you.
Where we acknowledge that we are living in different seasons, we can honour the people around us and maintain relationship. Not everybody has to experience the same thing at the same time. In reality, that’s just not possible. Some of us are in spring, others are in autumn and observing the death of some things. This is where we can be there for each other. When I am up, I can lend a hand to someone who is down. When I feel low, there will be someone around who is in a different place.
Let’s appreciate the nuances of the season that we are in and acknowledge others who are in a different space. Let’s position ourselves intentionally and show empathy where others are experiencing a different stage of life. Difference is not a bad thing; difference can be a strength.
There is a level of commonality between us, for example, we’re all heading toward the end of the year. Each of us experience that uniquely. Each of us face different decisions, challenges and highlights as the year draws to a close.
Take notice of things on your way, what surprises you? What can you be thankful for, even when things get uncomfortable? Whatever your path, whatever your season, be considerate to those around you who are in a different space, maybe you can strengthen each other.
